Tag Archives: happiness

A Better You

21 Aug

When not so-awesome days hit us, we actually feel down and zombie-like. It’s like some bottomless pit has existed within us and it sucks all the energy and liveliness from our being. Imagine some Kronos-like creature like the one in the Percy Jackson series which pulls you into some kind of an abyss of depression like state. Okay, maybe the description is over-kill but i have actually found ways to get my butt out and be myself again.

Think of Happy thoughts.

Whatever we think about, we bring about– that i read from the book The Secret, so technically when we think of those happy thoughts they kind of lift us from our depression and moves our thoughts to happy memories or to things that stir positive emotions and create serotonin or happy hormones. Think of your family, friends or that cute boy you have a crush on, the favorite book you recently read or the silliest joke that you could remember or your friend has whipped for you. For me happy factors would include those examples plus Jeremy Renner (hopelessly in-love -so dont mind k?)

Forgive and Forget.

Let go of any unpleasant emotion that is lurking within you. Forgive those who have wronged you and forget whatever they did to you, disperse resentment,grudge & hatred those will only make you feel worse and miserable, remember, you carry those feelings and it wont make you feel any better, when we forgive we actually free ourselves from that confinement and we bring about to ourselves a brighter and better future.

Be yourself.

Be who and what you are and don’t pretend otherwise,  express yourself in a way that let’s the whole world know that you are content with your unique individuality and personality. Wear clothes that actually fit your body and make you feel good, do things that would make you feel true to yourself, dance in the rain, splash around the pool, recognize the inner kid in you and indulge yourself to your happy pleasure, nothing to be ashamed of with that.

Recognize your Goals and hope for the Best.

Keep your goals intact and never let anyone or anything hinder and influence your positivity and your determination. Sure obstacles might be hurled upon you, there could be detours you would have to take but all of these are what makes the arrival on your destination even more worthwhile. Prefer optimism,  this certainty that everything will be okay and that you’ll eventually become the person you were meant to be. Some days, it will feel like you’re so far away from accomplishing your goals and that’s okay. Goals are meant to feel far away. That’s why we work towards them!

Do & Dwell on Good Things.

Try doing things that would make you feel good about yourself.Spend less time hate-reading things on the Internet and more time reading things that will enrich your brain.Surround yourself with people who make you want to be a better person. More kind, more considerate, more productive. Pay attention. Be self-aware. Try your best to understand those around you. Through understanding others, you’ll gain a better understanding about yourself. Most importantly Avoid engaging in behavior you know will make you feel ashamed. Easy as pie, right?

Things mentioned above might not work for everyone but somehow i hope that it kind of gives you an idea as to what really matter’s. It is that no matter what happens around us, what’s important is how we react and perceive things, after all we carry ourselves and it is us who decide how we face life.

On Relationships

26 May
We’ve all heard of this one; the ideal relationship that for a number of varied reasons didn’t work out. 
• The relationship developed into a long distance one
• Work got in the way
• Right persons, wrong time
• He wasn’t ready to commit emotionally (or you for that matter aren’t)• Your parents doesn’t like him / His parents doesn’t like you
• Situational divides (career/racial/ethical/spiritu al barriers)

Relationships like that can be summed up in one phrase: THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

The one that got away is lost to circumstance every time. It isn’t a shortage of love that kills it, but the inability to sustain it. One might call it altruism. Letting a person go not because it’s fair but because it is what’s right. One might say that being noble and releasing someone from the ties of a relationship when you don’t want to is the ultimate gift of grace. I call it emotional euthanasia. Selflessness… for now.

And that is what makes the one that got away so infuriatingly unforgettable. Because, at the back of your head, a window opens exposing a “could be” view of a future burning with so much potential. The “what if’s” eat at you because the fact is, that this guy… he wasn’t a jerk. He listened to you, made you feel special. You could even say that without a doubt he even liked you (and maybe even loved you).

But then a reason stepped in and thwarted all that wonderful potential. 

People see the one who got away as a “soulmate.” From what I’ve heard, a “soulmate” is the one true love that has been destined for you before you even came into existence. (Think “Born for you”, the yin to someone’s yang, two sides of the same coin, the one answer to all the queries in your heart). Every hackneyed, overused, clichéd lyric and corny romcom embodied in a single person.

Well… Here’s the thing: Bull. 

Hey, I have always been a hopeless romantic (sighs and cries at weddings, loves early morning walks, gushes over beautiful photographs,). But in spite of all that, I don’t believe in soulmates. “Why?” People ask me. Well, my problem with the whole soulmate thing is the thought that if you miss the right person or they got away (and didn’t come back) is that then you are screwed. Finding happiness will always be elusive. Second rate at best. Sigh. That’s really just depressing and strengthens my conviction that the whole “you are my destiny” institution is a stupid one.

I believe in the infinity of God’s creations. Meaning, there is not just “the one.” There are a lot of people you can have wonderful chemistry and “sparks” with. People with sincere hearts who can love and grow and stay. At times, they fit into your ideal. Sometimes they don’t. 

I love how Monica said it in FRIENDS. 
“Monica: I don’t believe in soulmates either.
Chandler: You don’t?
Monica: No. I don’t think you and I were destined to end up together. I think we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we really work hard.”

With some, the relationship comes oh so naturally…… and still, with others, you have to work hard. What I’m getting at is with either two, the happy story is possible. Romantic potential holds no bounds. “Love is like a bus. If you miss it, another one comes along.” Yeah, it’s corny… but infinitely more romantic I would say. It means that you will never run out of chances for love. The choice of starting over and finding something that lasts will always be there.

So… No destiny2x. No kismet. No fate. Definitely no serendipity. You get to choose your one person. And if you got two people who are willing to give things a shot and press on even when things get difficult, the chances are that it will work.

And when it comes to the one that got away……. Let them go. Silence the for nows because the future is immense and the world is big. Unbolt your heart to the chance that the one can be found in many places at many times. At this moment, you might not be able to envision an even greater relationship than the one that you lost but God’s infinite creativity is at work out there promising that love is possible. Anywhere. Over and over. Always. Choices too are a gift of grace.